So, why did Cupid resign?
I am going to say it now. I cannot do it any longer.
I am fucking done.
I am not going to go around and try harder with these fools you created with such hard work. For centuries I have been here and never have I seen so much stupidity when it comes to love, than in this generation.
I am doing my duty, alright? I have my arrow, with the right amount of the ‘love drug’ required, sprinkled slightly on the tip with the name of the lover whispered and I shoot exactly where it should, in the centre of the heart and yet, my magic doesn’t work.
They are stubborn, I will give that to you. The random hookups and their One Nights Stands and Tinder and blind dates. Well, I have to ask them something:
“Do you even know what true love is?”
Have you felt it?
Have you tasted it?
Have you smelt it?
Have you touched it slightly with the tip of your hand?
No. You cannot.
You claim to talk about love. Your poetry is about love. Your songs are about love. Every novel you pick up has the word, love. You say, “I’m in love.” But guess what? You aren’t.
God, I have been here for centuries and it is time I tell them what love is.
You are in love when you know the exact moment she is going to sneeze.
You are in love when you laugh when he farts at night.
You are in love when you want to meet her stupid dog, and you hate dogs.
You are in love when you decide to eat from that place that smells like rotten fish, just because you know she saves money.
You are in love when you see his photo and you stomach feels like it is bursting into tiny little stars of the galaxy.
You are in love when you burp into the other person’s mouth, and she finds it romantic.
You are in love when you let others love, whether the same sex, opposite sex or…just cross out sex, will you?
You are in love when you decide to give it your everything to that person, just to see them smile during the day.
You are in love when stuffing popcorn during movies means so much more to you than watching the movie anyway.
And when you are in love, you just know it.
But right now, you are not in love. You’re in pseudo-love. You are caught up in this idea, this social construct, this facade which people call love because it has become the next new thing to be intoxicated by, after drugs. And hey, it does not even cost money. The idea of being in love mystifies, so much so that you start believing you love the person when in truth it could be so much from lust to infatuation and from greed to desire.
God, I’m tired of working day and night, flying around, practicing my archery and finding soulmates because they just screw up my plan. They meet the wrong people and love the wrong people and cheat the wrong people and then cry and cry and I have to hear it. I cannot pick up these broken hearts because they are reminders of me not being able to do my job. It is affecting my family life and my wife is not wondering whether we are in love. It is damning me.
So, I have decided to make this generation an experimental group. I will let them break their hearts, tumble around, get hurt, hurt others, feel that love is a sham or “Pyaar ek dhoka hai” ( have you seen they are holding rallies for it?), kiss and make up and Netflix and Chill. Over time, they will realize why stories like Romeo and Juliet, Helen and Paris, and Heer-Ranjha are now forever etched in us. That is the only way. I have become obsolete for this world now.
I can’t help humanity anymore.